... constantly working out the details...

... constantly working out the details...

Monday, January 02, 2006

I heard a guy getting his heart broken tonight. I went to get a beer from the fridge and heard yelling in the parking lot of my apartment. i thought that people were fighting. I looked out the window. there was a man yelling into his phone about hating someone on the other line. he hung up. he was weeping. I lit up my last cigarette ( i am trying to quit for new years) and smoked out the window. the argument continued on the radio. the details were irrelevant. girl meets boy, boy loves girl, girl cheats on boy. boy gets crushed, boy cries on BMW. i felt a disparity, seeing someone so miserable, yet having nice material possessions. I am unsure as to whether to feel depressed or not. money may buy happiness, but it doesnt guarantee anything. he sounded awful. i cheated on a girl once. i felt awful, it was way worse than any time i got cheated on by girls. the girl sounded miserable. worse than the guy in the lot with the bmw. i wonder who hurt the most. one with a clean slate and a broken heart or the one with the guilty conscience and a broken heart. i have my suspicions. its been a little over 30 mins since my last cigarette and i am dying for another.

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